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"Tell the chef, the beer is on me."
Realism v. gender ideology: Women in apocalyptic fiction shaving their armpits.
By Lisa Wade, PhD
This is what gender ideology looks like. That’s The Walking Dead’s Rosita Espinosa and a total absence of armpit hair.
This is also gender ideology at work: the privileging of an idea of gender over real life or, in this case, realism.
The Walking Dead’s producers go to great lengths to portray what a zombie apocalypse might be like. They are especially keen to show us the nasty bits: what it really looks like when dead people don’t die, what it looks like to kill the undead, and the evil it spawns in those left alive. It’s gruesome. The show is a gore orgy. But armpit hair on women? Apparently that’s just gross.
Gender ideology lost this battle with realism, we’d see armpit hair on the women in Gilligan’s Island, Planet of the Apes,The Blue Lagoon, Beauty and the Beast, Waterworld, Lost and, yes, The Hunger Games – but we don’t. (Thanks to Ariane Lange at Buzzfeed for the whole collection and to @uheartdanny for the link.)
At least Rosita could conceivably have a razor. How do women supposedly shave their armpits on deserted islands? Did the Beast slip Belle a razor, you know, just as part of his controlling personality? And maybe some persnickety women would continue to shave even if they were lost in purgatory, but Ripley in Alien? Come on.
Our interest in realism only goes so far. Armpit hair on women is apparently one of its limits.
#yep#also friendly reminder that in The Hunger Games books this is an actual thing that is brought up#Katniss mentions that every time the Capitol gets their hands on her they shave her legs#she complains about it in the second book because her leg hair was just beginning to grow back properly after the Games#it’s weird and unnecessary to her#she would not do it normally#heck most of the women I know irl don’t bother to shave all winter#let alone COME THE APOCALYPSE (tags via enigmaticagentalice)
this is the dumbest fucking post about portrayal of women in the media I’ve read recently. If you wanted it to be realistic, none of the walking dead characters would brush their teeth and they’d be decaying and all yellow, none of the male characters would shave (some don’t but a lot do), everyone’s hair would be frizzy and gross af, and I could go on forever talking about things that humans in society are take care of on a daily basis that realistically nobody would take care of during the apocalypse. you can’t just cherry pick stuff that you think should and should not be realistic, that’s up to the director. nobody ever said that it’s more disgusting for a woman to not shave her armpits than it is for a zombie to get it’s brains spattered everywhere.
and have you even seen Alien? anyone who has seen that movie knows that it only takes place over the course of about a day or so, and she’s been comfortably living on the ship the film takes place on for a long time so she has basic hygiene products, and she’s probably been shaving the entire time she’s been there up until the point that the Alien hatched. Just because an Alien is on their ship doesn’t mean that her armpit hair is going to instantly grow ridiculously fast (and if it did grow that fast you can bet she would be shaving, if she didn’t she’d be able to braid it after a week)
Like seriously, why isn’t pole dancing an olympic sport? This is freakin gymnastics. This is strength and skill. This is not sexual whatsoever. Why does pole dancing have to be so stigmatised as a sexual thing that only strippers do? I have great respect for all people who can pull this off. This is art and beauty right here.
HEY FUN FACT: pole dancing is known as something strippers do because strippers invented it. And that’s okay! It’s okay to have respect for strippers and the hard work they put into what they do! Let’s stop trying to take the stripper part out of pole dancing so upperclass white girls can do it without being ~stigmatized~ because god forbid women be sexual.
Seriously, ballet was originally invented by prostitutes, and now look, it’s a fine art with no sexual stigma. Respect art in whatever form it comes.
pole dancing is beautiful.
Reblogging for the bold part.
1. buy them new clothes and other accessories to make them feel more comfortable
2. slam dunk the old clothes into the nearest donation center where they belong
3. respect your child’s identity and use whatever name and pronouns they want you to use
it’s really not hard.
Go to your nearest target. Buy a two pack of pushup bras (24$ for 2), and target’s bra inserts (12$). Then go to your nearest Walmart and buy the Vasserette Control Shapewear Panties (2.50 each), they do wonders for helping your tuck. There you go! You just saved yourself a lot of money, you can afford to buy enough to wear every day, and best of all you look fabulous. -@twidx
recs for trans women are so rare on tumblr!! spread this, people.
If you’ve been looking to bind, whether you’re transgender, non-binary, or a cosplayer, you’ve probably come across binders like these on Ebay, Amazon, or AliExpress. Usually they’re called E.V.A, SHO, Whatwears, or Ancient Fish King brands, all of which are apparently, interchangeable with each other. Ross is here to tell you that these chest binders are not much of a step up from ace bandages, which in case you hadn’t known already, are the worst thing you can do to bind your chest. So here’s the run down, from least bad to worst.
First off, the sellers are usually misinformed about why someone would use a chest binder is needed just from how they title them. Why would Lesbians want a chest binder (outside of cosplay?)? I don’t know, but most of these listings have lesbian in the name, suggesting that chest binders are for girls, not men or nonbinary. This right there should be a warning sign of a company that doesn’t know what they are doing.
The strapless binders’ model is wearing the wrong size for their chest. Their breast is popping out over the top of the binder, and I can personally say that with that binder, it is very, very, painful if you have a larger chest. After about 20 minutes, bruising and chaffing will occur, especially to those with larger chests or are heavier. In the worst case scenario, the breast will rip or pop as if it were cut with a knife.
Look at the materials used. These chest binders do not have any or enough stretchy material in them. Elastic or spandex is the best. On the ones that do have spandex, they don’t mention how much there is in the binder. This is an enormous, bright, flashing sign that the binder is NOT safe. Just how bad is it? Ace bandages likely have more elastic than these binders do, and the ace bandages can still kill you if they don’t maim you. A binder is supposed to stretch, be easily manipulated, and you must be able to take a full breath in them. I’ve bought and used two different types binders from Ebay not knowing any better, and I could barely take a breath at all. I did get larger and larger sizes, and with the same result. Putting it simply, their binders could be falling off of you because they are too big and still would not be safe.
Now I can’t show you in a picture about the next part, but what’s probably the worst about these binders is that their ‘binding’ material goes all the way around the binder. Your binder should NOT have this unless it is made to correct back posture. Sports bras can, but that is better for again, correcting back posture. So not only will you be binding your chest, but you’ll be binding your ribs, back, and shoulders as well. This can warp them and damage the tissue.
So what does a good binder look like? I’m going to use the binder I’ve had the best experience with as an example. The Ultimate Chest Binder Tank by underworks. I’ve bought two of these as I’ve needed them, I wore out my old one after a year and a half of use daily including at work.
So, straight off from the site, we know this seller is knowledgeable about their target audience. Chest binders are under the men’s section and you never see the word lesbian on any of them. The only thing marked for women under the chest binder section is a sports bra, put there because transgender men often use them for working out.
The information section on the binder isn’t just two or three lines, it’s a whole paragraph. What is this binder made of? Medical grade 70% nylon and 30% spandex knit. It says it right there and is readily available information, you don’t have to dig through the seller’s ads for cheap wholesale jewelry in the description to find it. The listing also tells us how much of each material is used, information you must have when buying a chest binder. My personal rule of thumb? If it’s under 20% spandex or elastic, it’s trash. Our listing also tells us how to put the binder on, rather than making you struggle to figure it out on your own. Size chart and customer reviews are readily available on the listing and not buried under ads for other unrelated merchandise.
Also from looking at the binder’s pictures, the front and back of the binder is made differently; the front is thicker and non transparent while the back can bee seen through a bit and is thin in comparison. This is because the front of the binder is made to compress and bind the chest and the back of the binder is not. All the binding is in the front, support in the back.
Please, know the difference between an unsafe binder and a safe one. Save your money and avoid ones found on ebay. Can’t afford a binder still? There are programs for people who cannot buy one on their own or it is unsafe for them to buy one. One such I know of is the In a Bind program, they have fantastic service if a bit slow delivery time. Remember, this program is only for transgender men and nonbinary, cosplayers will have to go elsewhere or outright buy a binder.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU
i’m sorry i don’t usually comment on posts but i keep trying to tell people this over and over again and a lot of the time nobody listens (hopefully they will now because this is an excellently constructed post)
an ebay binder pushed in one of my ribs and i barely wore it for any time at all (just less than an hour for convenience in my own backyard) because i knew it was bad but it seriously injured me that quickly.
the biggest problem is most people who give these things positive reviews have NEVER HAD A SAFE, PROPER BINDER BEFORE. therefore those positive reviews cannot be trusted! they don’t know how an actual binder is supposed to feel.
this is why i urge people not to include cheap ebay binders in their giveaways, especially. it’s not a game and it doesn’t matter how “safe” you are when using them or how well you advise people- they are NOT SAFE.
don’t harm people by trying to make it seem like it’s okay just because you want a couple more followers or to give something away because it’s cheap.
i cannot signal boost this enough, i had the ebay binder as my first binder so i didn’t know that it wasn’t meant to do any of the problems that i had with it, i thought that was just how binders were.
i wasn’t able to take a full breath in it even with it on the loosest setting, and it didn’t even bind well? i wore it quite rarely because when i did i got hot flashes, dizziness because i couldn’t breathe properly and i would eventually have to take it off because i couldn’t take it.
i wore it to london mcm comic con and i nearly passed out as a result of this shitty binder plus all the walking. i had to sit down for a good twenty minutes before i could get up and i felt like shit for the rest of the day even after putting it on a looser setting. it’s seriously hurt my chest too and has i suspect damaged some of the tissue there. absolutely don’t buy these brands they do more harm than good.
Yo, guys this is really important.
I have two of these, and while I’ve never had these problems (and I wear mine all day long), I have a really small chest.
Please be safe and get something like the Underworks or the Ancient Fish King binders. They’re more expensive, but unless you have breasts smaller than an A cup like me, you’re basically screwed with the ones shown in this post.
My boyfriend used Underworks like no tomorrow. They are honestly the best. Pricey, but the best.
Things that don’t make you less of a feminist:
- Being in a loving relationship.
- Being submissive.
- Wearing makeup.
- Being a housewife.
- Wearing dresses.
- High heels.
Things that do make you less of a feminist:
- Shaming women for doing any of these things.
Yes. 10000x thank you.
Reddit user HeMeYou was left “overwhelmed” by advice from online strangers after accidentally discovering his son might be gay.
The 38-year-old father posed the question to Reddit after finding Google searches on his son’s iPad suggesting he wanted to come out.
He said: “I found out my 13 y/o son is gay… He hasn’t told me, but I want to support him. What can I do?”
I’m 38, and a single dad to my 13 year old son, 14 in four months. The other day I asked my son if I could borrow his iPad and he gave it to me.
After my first attempt at Google searching something I noticed that he forgot to delete his history as a lot of the search terms were along the lines of “I’m gay what now?” etc…
I love him regardless of which gender he loves, in fact when I was slightly older than him I had a few flings with guys, which he doesn’t know about, so I am 100% supportive.
He has seemed slightly down recently, as in, he isn’t as cheerful as he once was, and I desperately want to tell him that I love him regardless of which sexuality he is.
What are my options? Should I wait for him to tell me? Or should I make a few hints at it?
I’m worried that if I don’t hint at it, that he will be worried about something that he really doesn’t have to be worried about… if that makes sense.
Shortly after, he received a flood of supportive messages, with many users offering advice based on their own experiences.
One user posted: “Google ‘how to tell my son I will love and support him no matter what’ and leave it in his search history.”
Another said: “Let him come out on his own terms, just make sure he knows that you’ll support him and you don’t have a problem with it.”
The father, who wished to remain anonymous, told Buzzfeed the response to his post was “overwhelmingly helpful and kind.”
A few days later, HeMeYou posted an update on what he ended up doing:
I started off with talking about general media with him, for instance I mentioned how awesome it was that Tim Cook (CEO of Apple) came out as being gay and I asked him what he thought about it and I was completely expecting him to give a typical teenager response like “yeah.. its good” or something like that but he actually gave me a detailed response which I absolutely loved because for the first time in a good while I’ve actually held a conversation with my son that felt really… rewarding.
I also wanted to talk to him about how I’ve noticed that he’s not been acting as cheerful as he usually has and I sort of gave the cliche spiel of “I love you no matter what and I just want to see you be happy” but I didn’t get much of a response that time apart from “yeah I know..”
The next day as I picked him up from school I thought I’d ask him about any crushes he has, and I wanted to make sure I didn’t say a gender when I asked him, so instead of ‘he’ or ‘she’ I used ‘they’ etc.. Here is that conversation as I remember it…
Me: So, do you have a crush on anyone?
Son: Uhm… no..m..maybe..
Me: Ohhh so who is the lucky person?
At this point he sort of looked at me slightly confused, I’m not 100% sure why, but I’m assuming it is because I said “lucky person” rather than “lucky girl”.
Son: Just someone from my french class…
Me: Oh yeah… so what do you like about them?
Son: Just.. stuff..
Me: Okay.. but.. like what?
Son: I donno they’re just kinda funny I guess…
At this point I dropped the conversation but just before I did I told him “Well, whoever it is, they should be so lucky to have you as a boyfriend..” and while I didn’t see it, I certainly felt as though he was rolling his eyes at my cheesy comments.
At the dinner table the same day, while we were eating we had a couple minutes of silence, not much was heard apart from the cutlery and my son finally said “I actually wanted to tell you something in the car, but I was afraid you’d get in an accident..”
I looked up from my plate and looked at him straight in the eyes… I could see he was thinking about something and all I could think of was “OMG this is it…”
He said “Dad..” with a couple seconds of silence “..I’m gay”.
I looked at him and couldn’t help myself from smiling, and I told him “____, you know I love you so much… right?” and I got up and gave him a huge hug.
He even started to cry on my shoulder and because of that I couldn’t help myself but shed a couple tears.
Concluding his post, he said: “After dinner and after he finished his homework we both lay in our pyjamas on the sofa, while I was watching the Cooking Channel and he was playing on his iPad.
“I had my arm around him and he was leaning his head on my chest, and all I could think of was that I’m the happiest father on earth right now.”
Anyone else weep real Jesus tears after reading this?
"Tell the chef, the beer is on me."
"Basically the price of a night on the town!"
"I'd love to help kickstart continued development! And 0 EUR/month really does make fiscal sense too... maybe I'll even get a shirt?" (there will be limited edition shirts for two and other goodies for each supporter as soon as we sold the 200)